We often hear phrases like “stay away
from negative people,” “surround yourself with positive people,” or “avoid
people who will bring you down.” These are poetic and quaint phrases with good
intentions but lacking one thing; clarity. It's not so much the people that need to be avoided, it's characteristics. People have several qualities, uniquely arranged, that offer a little to everyone. Secondly, much of the advice given, again with
good intentions, is vague and not descriptive. Information is only valuable if
it’s understood. Aside
from clarity, the meaning is distorted. So it may not be the people that are
negative, but the characteristics they present to you. We are all of different
value to everyone and it’s primarily based on the characteristics we offer. So with
a little evaluation, here are some descriptions people’s characteristics
that will surely negatively impact you along with an additional list of
characteristics which may impose some positive esteem in your life. These lists
define apparent characteristics for clarity and avoidance of
associating with them. Note that these characteristics
may not be present when the person you’re interacting with is
interacting with someone else. Everyone isn’t negative or positive the same to
a person. These are merely characteristics presented to you. This
solely for your own interaction. Furthermore,
negative doesn’t mean bad, just not for you, and positive likewise. There’s
no such thing as a completely positive or negative person, despite what media
claims. That’s bullshit and a reason people are so divided
against each other. The underlying notion is seeking out the individual and not the humanoid.
of the Negative
1.Associate themselves with a group, race, religion, organization, team, etc. When
someone identifies themselves as part of a group, they immediately surrender
their beliefs and feelings to the sake of the group thereof and individuality
is lost. Therefore, any opposition
have toward their “beliefs” will immediately result in conflict. Like
anything in nature, clotting of anything is no good.
2.Uses popular vocabulary/phrases you hear on TV or
using someone else’s words, which detracts thinking about the idea thus
welcomes foolishness. They’re not thinking but repeating. There’s not a lot of
life when the mind is dead.
3.Preaches hope/faith. If
you can’t see it, it’s a guess or a dream, and excuses work, and the desire
will eat your soul. They are excuse logic when it’s inconvenient thus being of
no help to you.
4.Constantly have opinions with no explanation. Would you fly on a plane if someone merely
says “I think it works because I know.” No, you’d need to see it. If you don’t,
count your blessings.
5.Follows crowds and goes with the popular idea. The holocaust was successful because
multitudes of people did what multitudes of people were doing. They followed
the popular idea at the time. Get on the train because everyone else is.
Boycott the Jews because everyone else is. Minus 6 million people later…
6.Extremely clean and indulgent in comfort. The body will turn to liquid shit if it
doesn’t have germs and physical resistance to build strength. Hang around long
enough and you will deteriorate too.
7.Mental make-ups of what’s right and wrong. They rely on others to determine how to
think thus you’re not actually interacting with the person themselves. The
secret is there is no right or wrong. You can prove this to yourself simply
8.Starts a conversation by blaspheming someone else. This
person will start a conversation with something along the lines of “they’re all
they’re so smart and everyone else is so dumb, exactly what are they doing
there? And if they’re there to save the day, apparently they’re not doing a
9.Mention the word Jesus (or any other religious figure)
300 times in a conversation. This should be self explanatory.
hot, gorgeous, young (20’s), beautiful women. This trait is emotionally
to both men and women. Men are too stupid to withstand compelling sexual
for women this will result
in envy and jealousy.
away! Happiness will never be found by any party involved.
11.Has a “me too” or “but did you ever” response. A
relationship isn’t a competition or comparison of experiences, but sharing.
When you share an experience or thought, and the other dismisses it with their
experience, they’re taking away your individuality and eventually will look to
steal your spotlight. If two people are struggling, neither can help the other.
12.Has 20/20 hindsight. This is the person who is so sure after
the fact or the I told you so person. They are looking for some recognition by
devaluing others. And if they make you aware that they knew before it happened,
your devalue is their value.
of the Positive
1. Ignores a phone call more than once during conversations with you. It’s
pretty apparent they value your company. However, it is excusable if they
interrupt a conversation for their family member.
2. Doesn’t immediately befriend you. This means there’s a ladder of respect
to be earned. True friendships are built over time and experience, not a few
words of declaration.
3. Waits for you to depart first. That means they’re willing to stay longer
if you want/need to. Often times, people end interactions with another
obligation. Someone who doesn’t have another obligation is a signal that you
may be an obligation.
4. Doesn’t begin
or end an
interaction by asking you for a favor. It’s an implication that your presence is
5. Doesn’t bargain with you. If something isn’t asked for in return,
there’s a bit of genuineness there. Treasure it!
6. Argues with your idea without classifying you. This is normally
found when arguing with a person and all of a sudden they accuse you of being
associated with a group’s particular to it’s belief system, like a liberal or feminist. Anyone who stays on
topic and doesn’t classify your thoughts is genuinely speaking to your mind.
Another trait to treasure.
7. Has sarcastic humor with you. This may seem insulting at first, but the
person actually has a trust that you are far more understanding than the
appearance allows. Furthermore, they trust in your acceptance of their humor.
This indicates comfort and acceptance of your presence.
8. Asks you open ended questions. Questions that don’t have a finite
answer means thought is involved. Furthermore, if the questions you’re being
asked is open ended, someone is interested in your thoughts. Your answers will
generally let you define yourself.
9. Uses direct language.
This is the person who may use some vulgarity for emphasis and gets to the
point. They’re aware of the dangers of beating around the bush. If they are
talking directly to you, that means they are paying attention to you. Also
realize not everything will be pretty. We have to appreciate the reality in our
10. Considers interacting outside of work, social drinking, drugs, dining, and
other common events.
These social recreations are too normal to inhibit any individual exchanges.
People who are willing to do something outside of the social norm with you in
particular have a vested interest in you and is something to be cherished.
11. Still talks to you after a break down. Not easy to explain, but they’re there
after you’ve denounced something(s) Very commendable.
12. Yourself! The
best way to put this “I” is first person. Your makeup, interests, thinking, and
desires will define what’s positive for you. You can’t be afraid of yourself by
being like someone else, regardless of what schools, TV, and others may tell
you. You are the number one person to work towards positive surroundings.